Healthy-ish

I'm trying to get healthy. Please note the word trying. In trying to get healthy, I'm also trying to be a vegetarian. I knew it was going to be hard, but I am here to tell you that it is both more and less difficult than I thought it would be. I realize that's a contradiction, but it's true. It's not difficult for me to avoid meat because you can buy all sorts of vegetarian things anywhere you go. The thing is that I miss the texture of meat..like, I miss chewing it. It's so weird. I've sort of decided to be more of a pescetarian because of this reason. I mean, economically, vegetarianism is working out well, so I'll only get fish and seafood when I go out to eat (which I realize is a little more expensive, but I might as well treat myself, right?). I'm also trying to do less caffeine because we were talking about the risk factors of osteoporosis in biology the other day, and drinking too much alcohol or caffeine heighten the risk of having it. So, less caffeine for me. You will find that this change in diet will make me a less than nice/happy person. Bear with me, friends.

Also, the dreams I've been having have not stopped. You know in "Eternal Sunshine on the Spotless Mind" how Jim Carey gets rid of Kate Winslet? Yeah, if that were a real thing right now, I'd save every penny to have it done. Yet, in these dreams, I am a willing captive. I was listening to some music today and randomly picked a song of Rufus Wainwright's new album. He put three Shakespearean sonnets to music, and of course, I accidentally picked the one that is most similar to how I feel.

SONNET 43

When most I wink, then do mine eyes best see,
For all the day they view things unrespected;
But when I sleep, in dreams they look on thee,
And darkly bright are bright in dark directed.
Then thou, whose shadow shadows doth make bright,
How would thy shadow's form form happy show
To the clear day with thy much clearer light,
When to unseeing eyes thy shade shines so!
How would, I say, mine eyes be blessed made
By looking on thee in the living day,
When in dead night thy fair imperfect shade
Through heavy sleep on sightless eyes doth stay!
   All days are nights to see till I see thee,
   And nights bright days when dreams do show thee me.